The Sims Online is all about escapism, living your life as someone else and enjoying experiences you never would in real life, like dying without consequence and property ownership. Despite the allure of this premise, the game hasn’t garnered the millions of players it deserves. Why?

We played GTA Online for five seconds and immediately understood the problem. You can’t feel like you’re committing hundreds of crimes a minute from a third person view. “Be somebody. Else.”? More like, watch somebody else enjoy a ball pit hot tub in an extravagant mcmansion. That should be YOU!!!

Starting TODAY, you can control your sims directly. No need for pesky “go here” interactions, taking boring fast straight lines to where you want to go. Take the longest path you want, run in circles, this is TRUE freedom. Everyone else will be able to see EXACTLY what you are looking at, with 32-bit floating point precision. Tell them how you feel to their (virtual) face. It’s like you’re living a Second Life, and it’s never been done before.

Instructions:

 

Press TAB to switch into first person view. Use WASD or the arrow keys to move, and the mouse to look around. Click on objects as usual to open the pie menu. Hold shift to sprint. Press backspace to cancel the active interaction. Press Escape to release the mouse, though opening a pie menu, dialog or chat will also do this. Click on the game to refocus mouse controls.

Note: You must use 3D mode to experience First Person Direct Control. Otherwise, you will just see everyone else having fun.

Soon, you might be WSAD’ing cars off the sheer drops around your flattened lots. You will be fighting to the death in a city spanning battle royale. You will be purchasing so many hats and gun skins that reality will lose its meaning, and you’ll be left living a cold husk of a life kept afloat by images generated by an unfeeling machine. Who knows where the future may take us?